‘We must pay special attention to this: the children and the grandparents.
Children and young people are the future, they are the strength, those who take us forward. They are the ones in which we place our hope. Grandparents are the memory of a family, they are the ones who gave us the faith, transmitted to us the faith.
” (WORLD MEETING OF FAMILIES 2015 PHILADELPHIA, USA)Nowadays family is the most valuable thing for any person. Family is considered the nucleus of civilization and the basic social unit of society. It has been and always will be our society’s pillar. Family starts up with marriage, which is the union, of a man and a woman, to complement themselves mutually and to give life and education to their children. It is much more than a legal, social or economic system. It is a community of love and solidarity, in order to share the virtues and human, cultural, ethical, social, spiritual and religious values.
The education and knowledge that are learned in the family, last forever.As a parent the type of discipline you use may have a very great impact in your children’s development in life. It will define the type of relationship you may have with your kids. The different disciplines can even influence in a children’s mood and temperament into adulthood. Is there a way to parent children that is better than others?Researches show that there exists four types of parenting styles. Each parent chooses the one they think fits best for their kids.The first type is the authoritarian parenting.
It is characterized by inflexible rules and high demands. Parents act strictly according to the established rules, expecting everyone in the house to follow them. They tend to be less emotional compared to other parenting styles. In here children tend to get into little or no trouble. If they try to challenge in some way the rules or ask why, the most common answer is “Because I said so.
” Parents may use punishments instead of teaching en ngconsequences. Some think that shaming a child is one of the best ways to motivate him to have a better behavior next time.Even if they grow up raised by this system where they are used to follow the rules all of the time, sometimes children become bitter or aggressive as they are focused on being mad at their parent’s punishment rather than learning how to make decisions and solve real problems. Children have fewer opportunities to practice selfdiscipline and with their mind in rules they have a smaller room for creativity.The second parenting style is the authoritative parents.
These parents also have rules that children are expected to follow, however, they allow some exceptions to the rule. They may give some explanations about the reasons for the rules and they are more willing to consider a child’s feelings when setting limits.Authoritative parents tend to use consequences instead of punishments. Children raised with authoritative discipline tend to be happy and successful. They are often good at making decisions and evaluating safety risks on their own. They often grow up to be responsible adults who feel comfortable expressing their opinions. They are more likely to become independent, self-reliant, socially accepted, academically successful, and well-behaved.The third one is the permissive parenting.
It is characterized for being nurturing and warm, and being reluctant to impose limits, in other words they are high in love but low on limits. They focus more in the child’s emotional development and their needs, yet they put aside limits and allow children to get their way most of the time.For example bath time or bedtime is at 7 pm one day and 9 pm the next one. By giving them so much love and creating bonds they negotiate to teach them right from wrong.This education style may create a better relationship and children tend to please people whom they know and love and are more likely to follow their directions.Sadly most kids as they grow up learn to manipulate parents to do as they wish.
They may become selfish and egocentric kids who are used to get their way all theParenting time. As these children grow older they use this manipulative behavior to accomplish their desires in life in an unfair way,The last one is the uninvolved parenting. These parents tend to be neglectful and often do not meet their children’s basic needs.
They are hopefully expecting their children to raise by themselves. Sometimes this is due to a parent’s issues or substance abuse problems. They may also lack knowledge about parenting and child development or may feel like there are more important problems.
Uninvolved parents tend to have little knowledge of what their children are doing. There are few or nonexistent rules for their children. These kids will possibly not receive any nurturing or guidance and they lack the much need parental attention.When parents are uninvolved, children tend to lack self-esteem and may perform poorly academically. They also suffer frequent behavior problems and most of the times are unhappy or feel unloved.
In my opinion raising kids is not a silly game, it takes a lot of time and effort to guide your children in the correct path. I believe one of the best styles for parenting is the authoritative. There is nothing wrong in trying to raise kids letting them know that there are limits, there are reasons for those limits, and that there are consequences to every action and decision that we take.The way I see it my parents raised me with the authoritative and permissive style. They were always setting limits, reasoning with me and my sister, and being responsive to our emotional needs. I think that is the key to somehow direct childre in the right way. There should be a balance, I would like my children to see me a an authority, yet as a friend who is loving and caring, Sometimes a little break wit extra love and less rules is healthy for everyone.